I calmed myself down. I did it, and it didn't involve taking a sharp object to my skin.
I feel proud. Because when I become that triggered, it was impossible for me to stop. The only way out is to hurt myself. On the downside, I did end up scratching my arms and they're sore, and I pinched a spot. I'm not counting that though, because most people do that absentmindedly.
I have hope. I will succeed in beating this monster.
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